Friday, October 17, 2008

Her depresssion

My mother is depressed, and has been for the past couple of days. I can tell by her lack of energy to cook dinner when I get home from work. Also she frets constantly about all the 'projects' she is facing and can't seem to get done. Which is kind of hard to listen to as she is retired and usually sitting in front of the tv when I get home.

However she is 84 years old and the primary caregiver for my dad who is 85 and has Parkinson's disease. Her life has been turned upside down over the past few years and now all she sees as her life is watching over my father.

Dad loves mom dearly, but they have 61 years of habits and built-in responses to each in their daily dance.
But she is lost I think and needs some kind of focus to give her life meaning. Maybe that is why she needs to be 'busy' and occupied with worrying about stuff.

I love them both and am very glad I'm here, don't get me wrong. But sometimes it is so hard to see my father fumble when trying to button his sweater, or take three tries to push himself out of the chair.
This aging business can really suck I think.
More tomorrow.

Monday, September 22, 2008

End of a working vacation

I'm in the Sonic restaurant here in New Orleans airport, waiting for my flight to Minneapolis, then home to Corvallis.
I just finished photographing a wedding in Gulf Shores Alabama. The Beach Club in Gulf Shores is fantastic. Perfect fine white sands and gorgeous sunsets. I think the Gulf coast must be nice except for the occasional hurricane or two.
Had lots of fun at the wedding, and many long treks on the beach by myself. Growing up with the Pacific Ocean as my only reference point makes the warm blue water of the gulf that much more inviting.

No caregiving, cooking or cleaning took place for me since last Tuesday. I can hardly believe that I'm returning to my life tonight.
I'll be posting photos later if I can figure out how to add them here. Also I want to write more on the southern way of living - it may sound laid back - but it most certainly is NOT!

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Living with a tired brain

here i am thinking that there might be something useful to write, when in reality my brain is too tired to compose much of anything.
But this is a start.

I've been here with my parents now for just about 11 months and every day it gets a little bit harder. My dad has Parkinsons Disease, but he is doing okay. He can still take care of himself for the most part. We had to take away his driving priviledges a few months back, but he seems to have adjusted.
My mother on the other hand is tired, angry and not a little depressed with the hand life has dealt her. Listening to her weep with sadness the other day in the doctor's office just about broke my heart. She is losing so much at 84 - and is fully aware of her dwindling mental capacity.

The three of us take it day by day.